A new perspective, a new life.

My last post dates back a month before my life was forever altered...so allow me to situate everything and then I can start over!

My pregnancy did work JUST fine! As I write these words, I have an absolute joy of 2 month old girl sleeping in her swing. So, YEY! That went fine! My christmas went fine and all fell into place. In retrospect, I think my depression was a cumulation of many bad circumstances, bad events and to some extent, lack of support. Loneliness is an ugly beast, isn't it?

So I began this blog page last year, hoping it'd help me vent. I realize now, that it only made me bitch and moan and air shit that didn't belong out there in the first place. I could (should) remove them, but I figure a new chapter is a new chapter. I start over and this is going to be my reminder of the ugly.

When I left Haiti on January 10th, after a wonderful christmas vacation, I had no idea that, to this day, it would be the last time I'd set foot there. I said my goodbyes to my friends and family knowing full well, that I'd be back by May in order to be with my family when I gave birth. The universe had a slightly different plan for everyone.

The months that followed were tough. The day after the earthquake, my J was flown out with other from his company to go asses the damage. He was gone for over a month. A month of stress,news of aftershocks, bad communication and absolute fear for him and my family... Up until last week, I was still hearing of a friend that had past away that day. As I count the days to when I get to go back to see my country, I also brace myself for the shock that I haven't lived yet. The shock of having everything you know destroyed. I can prepare myself for it, but I know I'll never be truly ready for it.

So even though I can't promise to be peppy all the time, that's just NOT me! I will check myself before I get all "doomsday"-y, dark again.

Till I come back, have a great weekend, y'all!